Ideas That Are Only Good When You’re Drunk

  1. Dance like a stripper or like your dad does at a family wedding. There is no in-between. No one can stop me now. I OWN the dance floor!
  2. Suddenly making your taxi driver your new best friend and therapist all at once. Terry knows all my secrets!
  3. Thou shall not mix my drinksI BLOODY LOVE SHOTS! ooo cider. How many champagnes have I had now? Who cares. Yes, I’d love a beer please!
  4. Telling everyone your life story because they do want to hear it. Make sure you repeat yourself at least four times so they do hear.
  5. Making friends in the toilets and taking lots of selfies together, because you’ll never see your new best friends, ever again.
  6. Having a wee and just sitting there, thinking about life… for a while.
  7. Texting all your crushes, exes, friends and anyone else you can think of, how much you really love them. If you can follow up with a 3am phone call, then great!
  8. Paying for everyone’s round, including that guy and girl you’ve never met. You love everyone! Everyone deserves a drink. We’ll just have to use my overdraft but that’s OK!
  9. Holding a cigarette and pretending to smoke it whilst sat outside in the smoking area. No one will know I’m a fraud and don’t smoke. I’m just here, because that cute guy is over there!
  10. Start crying for no reason but because you’re happy/sad/angry/over-whelmed/fearful/hormonal/anxious/excited/jealous
  11. Bumping into someone you used to go to school with and then start having a deep and meaningful chat, despite the fact you used to hate each other. “We should so meet up for a coffee babe!” Absolutely never.
  12. Begin an Oscar sounding speech to all your friends, about how much you love them and how you couldn’t live without them.
  13. Flip your hair back and fourth to create waves in your sweaty and messy hair, but end up looking like you’ve been dragged through a bush backwards.
  14. Taking so many selfies that your storage space becomes full and when the time comes to take an epic photo, you can’t take it! “Hold it there guys, let me just delete some pictures….”
  15. Your post-party food order and diet, goes out through the window! “Cheesy chips, burger, throw in some nuggets too, ooo yep I’ll have the Kebab and Pizza as well!”
  16. The difficult decision of wanting to go to sleep but knowing you can’t because you’ll be sick in your bed. Yeah, I’ll just sleep on this comfy bathroom floor, just in case…

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