If I’ve learnt one thing from my autistic brother, it’s to have no fear in saying exactly what’s on your mind.
No pussy-footing around the truth.
Just your real thoughts, out in the open for everyone to decipher.
Speaking with honesty has never let me down. Ever! That’s not to say I haven’t pissed people off along the way, because I have. I really have. But telling people the truth, at all times and what I’m really thinking, has always allowed one thing to happen:
People know where I stand.
You’ll never wonder if I don’t like you or if there is something on my mind, because I’ll always tell you. I choose friends who are similar to me in this way too.
Why would I want a friend who doesn’t tell me that my outfit is not “on point”, or a friend who doesn’t tell me that I was out of order for showing off my twerking skills at my Grandpa’s funeral?
I rely on my friends and family to tell me exactly how it is.
Surrounding yourself with people who only tell you what you want to hear, will never help you grow. You need constructive critisim to become the best person you can be. If you want sickly-sweet praise, go to your mum and dad. Your friends and partner, should be your cheerleader and mentor, rolled into one. They should always be the first ones to tell you when you did good and when you did bad.
Honesty is always the best policy!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not suggesting you go around calling people nasty names because you’re being “honest”. What I’m saying is if someone does ask you what you are thinking or what your problem is, then you should tell them; in a tactful manner.
Yes the truth can hurt sometimes, and you do need to be careful in how you express your opinion. Upsetting or bullying people is never cool.
As an example, if I’m out at a restaurant and the service or the meal is terrible, I’ll always complain. But not in the way you see some d*ckheads go about it. You know the type – there’s always someone who takes it out on the waitress. That’s not the “telling it how it is” style! Instead, ask to speak to the restaurant manager and tell him your thoughts, in a polite and direct tone. Some people would be horrified to do such a thing, but my theory is if I owned that restaurant, I would want to know and therefore I could make things right. Without knowing how could the business ever improve?
As well as being open with those around you, you should be honest with yourself too. Giving yourself some home truths never did anyone any harm.
The best thing I ever did was come clean (that’s not a pun) about my IBS. I no longer feel embarrassed about my digestive issues. And if I’m out in public and I need to go, I’ll make a joke about it. Usually something along the lines of: I’m going to the bathroom and I might not be back for a while….
Why hide the truth or lie about the reason why you’ve actually been in the bathroom for 2 hours?
It’s so much easier to be honest and say “my gut has been on fire”, than lie and say “I actually got locked in the cubicle and the toilet attendant wouldn’t let me out!” True story – I’ve been known to make some amazing excuses to hide my bowel problems.
Yes. I’m very black and white.
No in between.
There will be some people who live by the rules of being nice. That’s lovely. But I live by the rules of being blunt. If that makes me a bit of an arse at times, then I’m sorry – but I’d rather be known for being honest than someone who sugar coats the truth.
So yeah, I guess I look forward to your honest opinion on this blog post. *gulps with fear*
I’ve never been scared of constructive critisim. My only fear, is that I will never improve as a person.
I now know, that for me to make changes and grow, I need to be an open person and surround myself with honest people, who tell me exactly how it is.