So I can only imagine that the majority of you have clicked on this because you’re going through a messy break-up right now, or maybe you have a feeling that the end is nigh for you and your lover….
Either way, I have a few tricks up my sleeve to help you not only survive your break-up, but to come out the other side looking far better and classier than your other half! “It’s not a competition!” I can hear my own mother saying. But it is! Because let’s be honest – we all want to be the better person in any situation and we especially want our ex to look back and go God damn I messed up!
So heres my advice if you want to be the ex girlfiend his next girlfriend fears. Mwahahahaha!
- Stay away from Facebook statuses, quotes on instagram and lyrics on twitter.
It’s so tempting (especially after a glass of wine) to tell the world what you want them to believe.
Lauren: Wooo! I’m now single! Freedom at last.
Well that’s nice Lauren, but everyone knows you’re crying into your cereal bowl most mornings, even in despite of your hourly photo uploads claiming you had a great night out “with the girls”.
Keep away from social media and don’t you dare upload anything that hints at your ex! That includes quotes, lyrics and obvious statuses. You heard me! You’re fooling no one! #bunnyboiler
- If your ex moves on before you; wish them well and move on!
Sure she’s not you and you might be 110% sure that he swore that he hated Samantha from the office, yet now he’s dating her. Whatever the situation – it is no longer your situation.
Don’t get involved, don’t send abusive messages and whatever you do;
do not insult the new girlfriend!
If your ex has found the new love of his life, wish him well and move on. There is nothing worse than being branded as the psycho-bitter ex girlfriend.
- Start a new hobby.
How about those french lessons that you always say you want to do or that yoga class you’ve been dying to try out?! Start something new to occupy your mind. You’ll be amazed at how quickly you’ll forget about your ex and how quickly you might meet someone else. Win-win situation!
- Delete/Block everything
It’s nice to keep a memory box of things but sometimes the box does need to go in the bin, in order for you to move on. Especially if your ex has cut you off.
If you don’t even have a box (please don’t start now!)
The best solution is to delete your ex’s number, email, photos – basically anything that might make you ponder or drunk-contact.
If you don’t want to lose total contact, then I suggest blocking your ex on social media until you feel ready to have them as a friend. But only until you’re ready! Not when you want to stalk!!!
- Friends & Family
This might be an obvious tip but surrounding yourself with your friends and family will not only build your confidence back up but will also keep you busy.
Remember these are the people who love you unconditionally – so make plans. Book a girls holiday away, go visit your nan – do all the things that you didn’t do when you were busy with your ex.
Book a spa day, buy new underwear, get some make-up, workout until you are literally sweaty betty, because this is the best time to do YOU and only you.
Stay in bed all day and watch Netflix. Do what makes YOU happy!
If you want to cry, then do it. If you want to watch Bridget Jones on repeat, then do it. If you want to go out and party, then do it. Do whatever feels right, not because you think you should.
Don’t put pressure on yourself!
If it’s been nearly a year and you’re still sad about your ex, then that is totally normal too. Everyone is different with how they get over things. Some can take a little longer than others, especially if your relationship was long-term.
- But don’t obsess…
It’s important to grieve but if you’re becoming a social media stalker or are finding yourself talking about your ex at any given moment, then that’s when you should hear alarm bells ring.
If you feel the need to think about your ex, tell yourself to stop. The feeling of not knowing is 10000% better than knowing/wondering what he is up to.
You won’t help yourself to move on if you keep obsessing!
- Take your time and trust your gut!
Don’t rush into a new relationship to mask the pain. Take time to heal and to find out what YOU need. You’ll know when you’re ready to start dating, simply because of your gut feeling.