Someone once said to me, “If you could see your body from the perspective of someone else, do you think they would judge you in the same way that you judge yourself?”I thought about it and my answer was that I wouldn’t judge me, because I don’t look at people’s body faults. I’m normally looking at people because of their shining personality, or their beautiful smile or their cool dress sense. I don’t give a damn if someone has a horsey laugh or cellulite on their legs. I guess it’s because I’m too busy giving a damn about my own issues.
But then this is what got me.
Why is it that I’m my biggest critic yet no one else gives a damn?
That question stayed with me for a very long time, until the day I finally came to accept myself and my body.
Lots of you have been asking for advise on how to be body confident and here are my tips to love the skin that you’re in:
Stop criticising and start complimenting
You are your biggest critic. No one else. You can let negative thoughts or words affect you or you can let it wash over you.
It is totally up to you!
Start wveh day by complimenting yourself. Tell yourself when you look in the mirror or perhaps write it in your phone as a reminder. Do this every day for the rest of your life. You’ll be amazed at how positive you will become.
If you are struggling to think of a compliment, then think of your favourite personal quality that you like the best. This doesn’t necessarily have to be your looks, it could be your personality or what you are good at. If you are still struggling to think of something, then remind yourself of a time when someone else complimented you. Now Remember how it made you feel. Now keep that positivity and remind yourself of that compliment.
If you ever feel like criticising yourself. Stop. Compliment yourself and move on!
Admire someone else’s beauty without questioning your own.
You walk down the street and pass a beautiful woman. She has legs up to the sky, perfect skin and incredible eyes. Wow! What it would be like to be that woman? Wait a second. Why didn’t you question what she was thinking about you? I bet she was admiring your lovely smile and flawless skin. You didn’t think of that did you?
We are so quick to compare ourselves to others, yet we don’t appreciate our own beauty.
As individuals we all have amazing qualities and features, and yes, there will be times when you meet someone who has something that you could only wish for, but don’t forget, I bet you have something that they could only dream of too!
Look after yourself
Body confidence isn’t about looking good on the outside, its all about how you feel on the inside. Respect and love your body. It’s the only one you have – so look after it. Eat fruit and vegetables, drink lots of water and get plenty of shut-eye. You’ll be amazed how feeling good from the inside can do for your outside. Radiate from within and shine out!
Dress for your body
Culottes came into fashion recently and I basically laughed when I saw them on the catwalk. Seriously only 8 people in the world can wear them and look good. But here lies the trick….dress for your body!
If culottes look amazing on you – you rock them! If your short and curvy (like me) then let’s just stick to our skinny jeans and heels! Don’t dress because the trends are telling you to do so. Dress in what you feel comfortable in and what you feel looks good! Work with what your mama gave you and embrace it.
I’ll never look good in crop tops,!but c’est la vie, there are other clothes and styles out there that do suit me.
Self-hate isn’t good at any size!
There are so many different body shapes in the world that it would probably take me a month to write them all down. There is nothing wrong with what size you are, as long as you are not putting yourself in any danger.
I had an eating disorder at the age of 14 and tried to starve myself countless of times, so that I would look a size zero. My body is naturally athletic and curvy (thanks mum and dad) so due to the amount of stress that I was putting on myself and my body, my hair started to fall out! It was only until I learned that I would never be a size zero that I took the pressure off myself and continued with my sport and ate lots of carbs. Yes, I am muscular and have curves and yes I can’t fit into skinny jeans easily, but do I hate myself? No.
I actually hated myself more when I was really skinny and trying to be something that I wasn’t. Without having self-love I would still be the poorly and unhappy person that I was.
Love the shape that you’re given and work with it!
I’m short, I’m hairy, one of my nostrils is bigger than the other, I have small boobs and my bum is so big that I often wonder if I’ll get through my front door. We all have faults but who cares? As long as you’re a nice person and treat everyone else with respect it doesn’t matter. Accept and love who you are. If you can’t love yourself then who else will?