The other day I was chatting to a friend about our past boyfriends. We were both discussing where our exes are now and how different our lives would be if we had stayed with them. It was quite funny to chat about what we used to think of them whilst dating (obvs so in love) and how we feel about them now. I can’t help but cringe at most of my past, so I wondered, do my exes cringe at me too?
So, I decided to ask six of my exes their thoughts on our past relationship. Was it me? Was it them? Or was the timing just off? As one who naturally over analyses everything, I felt obliged to do this. I knew it would be interesting to see how different both mine and their perspectives would be.
I’m not going to lie it was a little strange to reach out to my exes, especially as I hadn’t spoken to most of them since we broke up. I knew they’d probably roll their eyes as soon as they saw my email but I thought I’d give it a try!
Awkward! I dated my first boyfriend for nearly four years. We were childhood sweethearts and although our relationship was immature I would definitely say I loved him. He broke my heart when he dumped me, but two weeks later he asked for me back. We continued our relationship for another year but by this point we were obviously growing apart. I wanted to go to uni and he was happy living in Somerset. It’s a shame we aren’t friends now as I think it’s always nice when sweethearts keep in touch.
“Dating Stina Sanders in my opinion, is comparable to eating a really nice dish in a snazzy restaurant and really enjoying it. Yet for some unknown reason (as the food and I are both good quality) the dish and I did not agree. The break up was relatively straight forward and amicable as it was simply down to a conflict of interest, because we were both at different stages of our lives. We also had different lifestyles.”
My second boyfriend was a short romance – I don’t think we even lasted for 6 months! I think I was still caught up with my last boyfriend but needless to say we had a good laugh. We just ran very different lives. We occasionally chat to each other and if we bump into each other it’s always nice to catch up.
Ex # 3
“You’re a c*nt. I don’t want to give you the satisfaction or the career help!”
Bitter much? I dated this guy for three years and although it was fun at first, it was terribly juvenile. I never really understood him as I don’t think he really understood himself. As soon as I started modelling in London I knew we wouldn’t last. We had very different interests and I couldn’t deal with his small-mindedness. It took me a while to split up with him, but when I finally did, I think I not only helped myself but I helped him. It was never natural – he made far too much effort and my heart wasn’t really in it. Despite it being five years ago since we broke up, I’ve heard through the grapevine that he is still not a fan of me.
“I remember spending a lot of time looking directly in your eyes… It felt like genuine fate that brought us together, but from my side it seemed like bad timing as we both had someone else.”
I was still in the process of splitting up with the previous Boyf when I met this man. We met whilst shooting for a kissing campaign for More Magazine. He was a model, an ex-marine and looked like Channing Tatum. It was hard to resist a kiss even off camera! The cheeky bugger didn’t tell me he had a girlfriend for a long time but as soon as I found out, I knew we had to leave each other alone. He is one of the nicest people I know and I will always call him a good friend. I know if I had a problem, he’d be at my door in seconds.
Ex # 5
The abusive X….think I’ll not message him …
Did not want to take part – but wished me luck for the future.
I put my hands up to this man, as I wasn’t at my best when dating him. After coming out of a horrendous relationship I met this guy through a friend. He is a truly lovely person and he actually helped pick me up from the floor when I was at my lowest. We hadn’t spoken to each other since we split, so I contacted him via Facebook and had a nosey peek at his profile. I saw that he is now in a relationship with a beautiful girl and is obviously very happy. It was nice to see as he deserves it!
“We were only together for a short while, but short and sweet is probably the best way to sum it up. Call it a typical Sandy & Danny Zuko kind of deal (the summer part at least, not the leathers and happy ever after that followed). Stina is the exact opposite to how everyone expects her to be and it was a pleasure to have a peak behind the curtain that only a few good – and some bad – men have seen. We only ended because of our geography downfall.”
As you can probably tell from this response, we are still very good friends. It was a brief romance that ended as genuine friendship. I think it is possible to be friends with an ex, but there needs to be absolutely no feelings involved on both parts.
So sadly, my research didn’t offer me any major insight, or even teach me something that I didn’t already know. If anything, it proved what I already knew: that things happen for a reason. I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be, and they’re where they’re supposed to be, and that’s not just good, but great!