We’re not tins. Stop labelling yourself!

Watching Ruby Rose’s gender fluidity video has really got me thinking…..

Rose experienced confusion concerning her own gender and identity during her childhood – at one point she had even considered sex-reassignment surgery.


Why as a society do we need to identify ourselves and tell the world what we think we are? It’s like we’re always looking for approval and social acceptance by simply labelling ourselves.

From the last time I checked, I am a straight, British – white female. I’ve had boyfriends and never girlfriends. The closest I’ve ever been to a girl was a cheeky snog with my best friend whilst drunk in a nightclub. As far as I know, I am not bisexual. But that’s not to say I don’t fancy girls, because I do.

I love an attractive woman and I can appreciate the same-sex. I’ve had fantasies about girls and enjoy watching female porn.

I think I’m still straight? Maybe bi? But here lies the problem…

Why am I questioning who I am and why on earth does it matter?

I’m not doing anyone any harm by being myself and nor is anybody causing me harm for being who they are.

So why is it that we have all become obsessed with sticking a label on ourselves?

Last year Facebook added more than 70 gender and sexual orientation options. Shortly after this revamp of choices to select from, a study was conducted about people’s sexual orientation. According to the study, when it comes to sexual preference, many people are neither 100% straight nor 100% gay.  The recent research found that when given the option, many males and females would describe themselves as “mostly straight” rather than “straight.”  So what is Facebook going to do now? Provide more options?

The study revealed that everyone’s sexual orientation can be easily diverse:

Your emotional attractions may lean towards people of the same sex, whereas your physical attractions could lean towards people of the other sex. And vice versa!

The truth is us humans love classifying things. Studies have found that we all have a strong drive to clearly define the groups we belong (or don’t belong) to. It’s something we feel that we need to do. However labelling ourselves is actually the worse thing that we can do. Whatever definition we apply to ourselves, whether this is gender preference or sexual orientation, we can actually taint our behaviour towards others and falter our progress to grow as a person.

My point is that maybe we should all stop being so quick to label ourselves for the benefit of other people. We need to start accepting ourselves and understand that we are all individuals and not another person that is shoved into a category.

If you’re confused as to who you are or what you like. Take a deep breath and understand that your personality and tastes can be fluid. Being in the middle of the road, is ok!

At the end of the day if you’re worrying about whether you’re gay, straight or bi, don’t worry about it! Are you happy with who you are? If yes, then that’s all that should really matter. Just be you.

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